Saturday, September 8, 2007

You'll Find It At Fred Meyers.....

I had stepped into the women's restroom to freshen up after a long day of teaching and school shopping. What I heard in there brought a myriad of different emotions to my mind.

There was a woman in one of the stalls crying. At first I thought she might be on the phone. (I don't understand how people can have phone conversations in a public bathroom but it happens all the time.) I did what most anyone else would do in that situation....I cleared my throat so that she would know she was not alone in the room anymore. My actions though did not achieve a usual reation. Instead, her crying became sobbing. Her sobbing then became humming, mubling, and escalating to singing. She was not on a phone. She was in her own world of pain.

Her statements and song words revolved around a broken heart. "Don't leave me alone," she said. "You love me and I love you." This was repeatedly followed by, "Please don't do this to me." Her words became a chant and rhythm. Though I could not see her behind her closed door, I could easily imagine her swaying back and forth in time to the beat her current world
surrounded her in.

I thought so many things in the few minutes I was in there.
Do I ask her if she is okay? No of course she is not okay. I thought about my current skills as a emergency services volunteer. But then I realized I would be in way over my head. I get dispatch calls only after the police deam a situation safe. Who knows what this poor woman would be driven to do. Would my reaching out to her be her last straw of sanity? Would her hurt and pain be unleashed on me? Whatever the circumstances were that brought her to have no qualms about this current semi display in such a public atmosphere....could they cause her to do something to hurt herself in that stall?

So, I chose to leave the room and notify management.
I don't know what the final outcome was....can there truly be a final outcome in the midst of so much pain?
I just know it has been haunting me.

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