New things seem to always be different than from what we imagine they will be like.
I am now into the 3rd week of the girls going to school and me having a lump of time on my hands. I had imagined that I would stand in my house alone, evaluate my day and choices, and then choose something constructive or adventurous to do with my time.
That hasn't happened yet.
Instead I get to the end of my alone time and find I have done nothing at all. The mindless TV has been my companion. All of the house cleaning that I never had time to do before and figured I would attack with zeal......nothing. If it wasn't for the joy of my dad flying in from Texas next week I don't think I would even want to scrub the bathrooms.
I know I am in a transition. This mindless numb feeling will shake off.
I did have a glimmer during my walk yesterday. (hey I am up to 5 miles now)
Instead of rhythmically stepping with an a mind full of emptiness, I did notice a few things and began to compose slivers of thoughts in my head about my walk.
I noticed the smell of fall in the air. I enjoyed the sun in the sky doing it's job, warming the earth and air from a crisp 53 degrees to 74 degrees in a matter of 80 minutes. I recognized that there are many different types of people using the trails along side of me. I saw moms with running strollers, business men biking to work with their suits on, seriously dedicated exercisers, and casual walkers with their Starbucks mocha cup in hand. Cottontails hopped in and out of the trail while morning birds called out their tributes. I even saw a doe with her fawn having breakfast under a tree.
God is good, life continues, and even this season will pass for me. Before I know it, I will be back in a groove and being productive.