Sunday, September 21, 2008

"How are you doing?"

"How are you doing?"

I have heard that question a lot this week and I have answered it truthfully each time. That can be harder than you think. It is all too easy to say, "I am fine" or "Good" and not give it time to sink in and be real. I tend to use those pat answers because I don't want to "burden anyone with my woes". But this week I decided that people wouldn't ask unless they really wanted to know.
Of course I am careful to keep my answers short and not give the listener more than they bargained for.

That makes me smile. It reminds me of being on the flip side. Being on the long listening end of a story after I ask the question, "How are you?" happens to me a lot. I enjoy it. I like letting people know that someone cares and many times it is obvious that I am the only one who has asked them in quite a while. My husband laughs because invariably I will get into a conversation with the person at the check out register about their day, their limp, sprained wrist, bad attitude, recent car accident.....or a myriad of other stories. He has stopped asking me, "where do you know them from?" because the answer is usually the fact that I just met them in that 5 minute time frame. You name it and I have heard it. I once even had someone confess to me that she had cracked her ribs while ....being intimate.

I am told I just have one of those faces that say it is okay to spill your life and I will listen.

Many times someone will stop me in a store and ask where something is as if I work there. Do I explain that I am a shopper too? No. You can shake your head but I usually figure out where the item or place is and help them find it.

I have no idea where I am going with this or why I started sharing it.
I actually sat down to say that it has been a busy weekend.

My dad flies in on Tuesday ...........

13 comments:

  1. I do that stuff, too! I just helped a lady at the grocery store yesterday.

    I know you're busy getting ready for your dad, but Punny Monday is just a few hours away. I hope you can play!

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  2. Jules..
    there's a saying..you see a person's face..and almost instantly, you can decide if you like the person or not, irrespective of his/her true colours. I think you have that..where people warm up to you and therefore, tell you something even if you dont know them. It's the sincerity in the face, the kindness and a pleasant look. And Yes, when someone ask us how are we..we tend to say it's good..I dont know how else to answer them.

    I hope you are having a great week and a nice time with you dad too. much love and hugs :D

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  3. Quilly...good for you. Doesn't it feel good to help people?
    Punny Monday huh? I will have to check it out after my morning walk.

    m.kate....thank you. That is very kind to say.
    I am so anxious for my dad to get here. I am really sleepy and yet I don't think I will get much sleeping done in the next two days. My mind is whirling with how things wil lbe.

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  4. Thanks for your visit ...glad you liked the Giant Candles flowers! I hope that you are doing OK you didn't actually answer your own question.Hope you enjoy your Dad's visit..!!

    Annie

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  5. "I am told I just have one of those faces that say it is okay to spill your life and I will listen."

    Maybe. But I think they 'see' your heart...and it's a beautiful one~

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  6. Jules who is listening to you.who will bend a ear for you.love to all.

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  7. Jules got to tell you this one i came out of church the postor asked me how are you alan.i came back with or my right leg fell off.pastor thats nice see you later.

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  8. Are you a long lost sister? This had such a familiar ring to it! I love talking to people (would talk the hind leg off a mule if given the lead!)...loved this post!
    hugs
    Sandi

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  9. takehttp://ddraigsynyma.blogspot.com/ alook at some dear friends ?

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  10. And if you go to my daughters blog you will understand about the knight.http://ddraigsynyma.blogspot.com/

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  11. That's cool that people feel like they can open up to you like that. I confess that I had a bad attitude when we used to shop at a certain grocery store in Chicago, and every once in a while, people would ask if I worked there. I never figured it out... I wasn't wearing the same colors as their uniforms, but folks would walk right up to me, and say, "Excuse me, do you work here?" After a few times, you begin to wonder what's going on, and there is a temptation to respond with a smart remark. I didn't... but I reeeeally wanted to.

    Your dad flies? That's extraordinary! Do you mean flying like Icarus or Superman? Either way, tell him to be careful for power lines; that's the worst thing about landing in residential areas. Trust me; I know.

    Anyhoo, in our family, we have this joke about when someone asks "how are you," we say something like, "Oh, I'm sooooo glad you asked! I didn't get any sleep last night, and I have this splitting headache, but I think it's because of my back problems, and my knee might need surgery..."

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  12. Annie...thank you. I am doing just fine. Whenever I feel rocky, my personal motto comes to mind. "Just breathe and believe."

    Carol...I thin kyou must be the same way. I love to hear your heart in your words.

    Alan...thank you I will take a look soon.

    Sandi...Hey sister! Blessings to you.

    Craver...you are too funny.
    In my family we have sort of the same joke that happens. When someone in the family starts whinning we will come back at them with an island phrase. Should I even say it here? Hey it is my blog right?
    Wait...can I spell it? I will do the best I can.
    It is called having sore coo. Translated "whiny butt".

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  13. Hey Ms Jules, I can relate working for the public in the Post Office. It is amazing how much you can find out about a person in the short time that they stand in front of you. I think what it is, is that people need someone to care, and the older ones are generally lonely. I love to flirt with the old men. My goal is to make all the grumpy old men smile.

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