She Held It In Her Heart.....

Last Friday, Puddin' and I were on the drive to school when we witnessed a hit-n-run. It was a small accident but shocking all the same. I was so shocked in fact that it didn't even occur to me to get the license number until it was too far away to see.

We pulled over to make sure the one who got hit was okay. Poor thing was wiping back silent tears and shaking her head in disbelief. She said she had been home sick all week and had decided that morning she should get back to work. I apologised for not being able to get information on the car that hit her but shared my name and phone number as a witness in hopes of helping to file a police report.

I really wanted to pray with her but the timing just didn't seem right. So after once again observing that her neck seemed fine, I walked back to my car. Puddin' greeted me with concern, then a sigh. we prayed together for the woman as we drove on towards school. Then Puddin' said, "Mom how could that girl just drive off like that? That was so ...so....MEAN!"

As I searched for a correct answer while feeling within myself the irritation of wanting to give that girl a few thoughts of my own, I heard God say, "Think about it for a minute. What would make someone run away like that?"

(Actually if I could digress for a minute, we are avid movie fans and I often think of movie clips that cause me to relate. So it was like in the movie I-Robot when Detective Spooner was asking questions of Dr. Lanning's hologram in effort to solve the crime and the final answer was, "Now THAT is the correct question.")

I mulled that over as minute-marts and grocery stores blurred through my side vision and then posed the thought to my daughter.

Yes the accident was a bummer and shame on that girl for leaving. But it was a simple accident. How many of us have seen the turning lane go out of the corner of our eye and caught ourselves starting to go as well? It would have been so easy to jump out and say, "Oh my gosh are you ok? I am so sorry." So what happened in her life that taught her it was okay to not answer for her actions? How must she bee feeling inside after leaving and what is she compromising in her heart to pretend that all is okay?

We ended up recanting our previous condemnations and praying for that girl as well.


The day went on and as school usually is, it was emotionally draining for Puddin'. She got in the car after school and talked about a fight that broke out in the commons area. In most high schools here there are police that serve as security. She said that the police had to get quite physical to pull the youth off of one another and it shook her up. "Mom I didn't see the fight because there were so many people around. But friends told me that the police grabbed the kids by their hair and hit them. Aren't they supposed to protect?"

I explained that 2 things happened. The first was that she was told the story through the eyes of excited teens and that can honestly make events be a little more elaborate than what really happened. The second thing that happened was that police officers must contain the situation before others get hurt or a riot breaks out. If the youth were not responsive to verbal calls then something had to be done. Dare I say it is the lesser of two evils. Even a life guard is taught to hang back until a drowning victim passes out if that is what it takes to keep overall safety a priority. And besides, we see all kinds of things happen in movies. Officer Joe Shmoe takes his attitude out on someone and gets away with it while everyone cheers. In real life if that happened, a police officer would be in jail before school even let out and it would be national coverage.


Later that evening we went to a church service and focused a couple of hours solely to worship. Puddin' collapsed and cried for a majority of the time. She released frustrations of things she had seen, frustrations of school, frustrations of being around so many youth that hold onto attitude and selfishness. She questioned the point of being there and entertained the idea of home schooling again.

Then I watched as a young man, you know the one that is so special, went to her and shared a vision he had just had about her. Without knowing anything that she had been struggling with moments earlier, he shared her purpose. He said that he saw God dancing with her. They were spinning in joy. Then God picked her up and tossed her skyward in a climax of delight. When she reached the pinnacle of height she burst into a display of light and gold dust fell everywhere.
The young man then asked God what such a vision could mean and God told him it meant that she will cover her school with God's light and dust everyone with the treasure of His truth.

She giggled, her eyes sparkled and tears ran silently down her cheeks as renewed hope and purpose coursed through her. Then a girlfriend grabbed her hand and they ran to the front of the room and began dancing in praise.

My mother's heart felt so full of emotion. I volleyed from my original crippling pain and frustration of not being able to fix all hurts for my children. Then I was hit with a smattering of wonder at once again watching the purity of their relationship unfold an inch more while completely keeping God in between them. My final emotion was sheer gratefulness to God for always knowing and always orchestrating our lives. How well He knows what we need to hear and when we need to be lifted up.

Jeremiah 29:11 says....
¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Long before it was our church foundation verse, it drove me through life and situations. I can never say enough how grateful I am that the author of the heavens and the earth, the creator of the universe who breathed life into all things and fashioned every molecule with purpose.....loves, watches, and guides over me and my family.

Know today that you are loved.