Saturday, November 6, 2010


So much has changed.
The strength of our minds and what we will ourselves to push through has never been more apparent to me than it is now. It amazes me to look back now and realize just how much Daddy has been pushing himself through with his continual response of "I'm just wonderful".

Wednesday morning at 5am Daddy got up from his chair and in 3 steps he lost the last of his physical strength. With God's help I was able to keep both of us from falling and fen angled him back into his recliner where I balanced him on the edge of his seat for almost 2 hours until my morning help arrived.

Daddy is now comfortable in the bed and I must keep him medicated around the clock for his safety and peace. Once he became weak, Daddy's physical health declined rapidly. In a matter of hours we went from being able to walk outside and carry on short conversations to my own fearing realization that I couldn't not safely provide care for him by myself.

Our amazing angel, our hospice care manager, began the process the yesterday morning of getting around the clock nursing staff in here to help me. I am so grateful. Such a weight has been lifted off of me in knowing it is not my sole responsibility to continuously assess Daddy's vitals and think of every angle of his care. It is such a relief to not have to plan out how to turn him and change him by myself. The nurse here has helped me to adjust his medication and get him into a place where he is more comfortable than he has been in a week.

Despite his lethargy, his body's refusal for nutrition and hydration as well as his lungs becoming more wet by the hour.....he still tries to lift his hand and mumble when I whisper "I love you" in his ear.

My brother is here now and he has been such an amazing support. His presence here has given me the opportunity to relax my mind and not think ten steps ahead. As he laid his luggage on the floor he was asking me to show him how to use the various pieces of medical equipment here so that he could do everything that I had been doing.

I don't like to leave Daddy for very long and I sleep on a chase that I put next to his bed. But having the nurse here last night gave me the opportunity to feel safety in submitting to sleep. Until the nurses arrived with their blessed help I had been administering calming medication every hour with no breaks for 3 days straight and sleeping in 3o minute increments.

Family will be driving in today and Red Cross has made the necessary arrangements to get our youngest brother back here from Iraq.

I don't know what will happen now but I am so grateful for God's hand in keeping us safe and for providing caring and gracious people all around.


  1. Hospice is such a wonderful resource. So glad you have them! So glad that you can have some rest! So wonderful that red cross is aiding your family in getting your brother home.

  2. Dear Jules. The dignity with which you are handling this traumatic time and the love your father is showing you in his lucid moments, will nurture in the days ahead.

    Sending you strong thoughts of hope and love.

  3. Hello Jules
    Your father is so lucky to have a family willing to care for his every needs. Now you need someone to care for yours - take the 24hr hospice care and enjoy the peace of mind it will give you for a while. Thank you for your caring words when you visited Jules - Rest up in the company of your family (safe trip home for your brother also)
    Take care

  4. My Dear Friend, I agree with others that Hospice is a God send.

    And now I send you all the prayers of encouragement and comfort I can. "Heavenly Father send your angels of mercy and peace to surround the house where these saints are may your love fill every corner of this place..may Julie and her family rest in your arms."


  5. Hello Julie,
    Just wanted to tell you I’m thinking of you, no need to reply back, just know you’re in my heart today and always. I love you.

    You and Jody are in my heart. Please keep listening to the sweet voice of God, breathing love and strength into every breath.
    I love you,

    Hi Julie,
    I am praying for you my dear friend. I have been keeping up with your updates and my heart aches for you. I pray you sense His presence like never before. You are a strong women of God and what you have been doing is amazing! I know the Lord and His angels are right there with you. You are all in His care. I wish I could be there for you to help in some way.
    Take care, and I'm glad you have some help so you don't have to bear this great responsibility by yourself anymore.
    Much Love,

    Hi Julie,
    Thank you so much for including me in your group email. I am deeply touched by the level of your sharing, and by the beautiful way you express your thoughts and feelings. What you are going through with your dad is just about as profound as it gets, and I feel honored to witness your process together. May God’s blessings continue to flow through your heart and soul in your devotion to Jody. Please give him my love.
    Thank you,

    I just wanted you to know that I am praying for you. You are such a wonderful, precious daughter!
    Every moment you have spent with your dad has been a huge investment and pleasing to your Heavenly Dad.
    You have hosted the presence of God in your Daddy's home, which will make his transition into his heavenly home so much easily.
    I pray the Shalom peace of God over him and you. We are so proud of you and love you so much!
    Robbin and Joel

    Wow, Julie~ I am so happy for your sake that you now can rest while someone else takes care of your dad. I had no idea that you were carrying such a heavy load. Bless your heart!
    Praying for you all~
    Love Helene


I love to hear from other. Your opinions and viewpoints are always a blessing and encourage other readers as well.